04 June 2005

Loose Thoughts...

  • From the "no shit" file, looks like Jason Giambi is losing endorsement contracts like muscle mass-

    A Nike spokesman confirmed to ESPN.com on Thursday that the shoe and apparel company "no longer has a relationship" with the New York Yankees slugger.

    Giambi confirmed he no longer has a relationship with Nike before the Yankees' game at Kansas City on Thursday night.

    It is not known whether the company's decision not to renew Giambi's contract is related to his reported admission of steroid use or is a result of his poor performance on the field. Giambi is batting .234 with four home runs and 13 RBI.

    Stupid question- aren't the steroid and shitty play issues more or less like fingers on the same hand? He seems like a nice guy, but every time I start to feel the least bit bad for him, I think of all the shit Barry Bonds gets for this, and I remember how little Giambi's felt in comparison.

    He looks depressed, utterly disinterested in playing, and totally defeated. Remember what he was like on the A's, smiling, funny, free spirt? He'll always be the poster-child for "don't sell your soul for more dollars." I mean, I didn't blame him for taking extra money, but it was like Timothy Leary joining the Hitler Youth. Not a great fit. "Cut your hair! Shave yourself, everywhere from eyebrows down."

    Yeah, I said it, they make Yankees shave their balls and legs. Don't believe me? Prove it.

  • Bob Watson is head of discipline for MLB. Bob Watson used to play for the Yankees. Terry Francona got a three game suspension for being thrown out of a game after one of his pitchers hit a batter post-warning. Joe Torre got a one game suspension for being thrown out of a game after one of his pitchers hit a batter post-warning. Terry Francona was told he was not allowed at the ballpark during suspension, and in the game that was to precede a plane flight minutes afterwards, was forced to sit in a skybox to watch. Joe Torre was allowed to watch the game from the clubhouse and be with the team before the game.

    Now hell, I wonder why Francona's upset about that?

    "I think it's horrendous," Francona said of the differences. "It seems a little inconsistent, at best."

    A MLB spokesman said disciplinarian Bob Watson has received Francona's messages but has been unavailable to return them yet.

    Just like the Yankees, who inexplicably don't wear the in-dugout jackets every other team in MLB do (per licensing rules)- they wear those older puffy satin ones. Just like the Yankees don't have Jackie Robinson's "42" retired, but have about 300 other ones in their little LF museum. Yeah, I know Rivera still wears it. I don't get why they can't put a blue 42 out there though.

    They think they're above the rules. They think it's them, and the rest of baseball where rules are concerned. See also- Tampa Bay Devil Rays, request for their forfeiture from Randy Levine per late show due to horrendous hurricane.

  • Any Hollywood producers among my readership looking to cast for a druglord-child-molester-coke-fiend? I have an a suggestion:

    He had the day off, and in the interest of keeping the cut on his face- seen here- (given to him by the Fenway bullpen wall) in good shape, he decided to shave the beard. That said, by the time he pinch hit later on, the stache was gone, unfortunately, as was the ponytail.

  • Jere asked in the last comment section which of "Charlie Murphy Hollywood Stories- Rick James" or "CMHS-Prince" I liked better. Really, really tough call. A couple points-

    --The two impressions could not be more evenly matched. The Rick James one is just flat-out hilarious and, judging from the commentary, totally inspired. When Dave was yelling "it's a celebration, bitches," he had no idea James used to shout this constantly. That said, Dave absolutely nailed Prince, and was just as funny in it's own way.

    --The funniest moment, for me, in each sketch are pretty evenly matched. In the RJ episode, it's when RJ is tending bar at the China Club, and sort of slaps Charlie Murphy out of nowhere. The look on Murphy's face is insanely funny- and his voiceover kills me- "I'm thinkin, 'this nigga has lost his fuckin' mind."

    In the Prince one, it was Charlie talking about how the Revolution were setting "fruity picks," where the guy would get all uncomfortably close to you and your ass, and moving would only make it worse. That shit was hilarious.

    --One thing for me though- I didn't see these sketches until long after I'd heard them recited by people constantly. I can defintely see certain things blowing me away more in their funniness if I'd never heard of them previous. Like Prince serving pancakes. Or the "cocaine is a helluva drug" line from James.

    That said, based purely on the dirty-shoes-on-leather-couch scene, I have to disagree with Jere and say I find the Rick James episode funnier. "They shoulda never given you niggas money!"

  • Speaking of the man- there's been a sighting in LA, which is a great, great bit of news. And, he "felt like performing." Cool.

    Chappelle served up some impromptu standup to stunned audiences at the Hollywood Improv and the Comedy Store.

    "The place went ballistic. The kids were on their feet. We had a college night going on," said Reeta Piazza, the Improv's special events manager. He showed up about 11 p.m. and did a 15- to 20-minute set that focused on current events.

    Chappelle then headed to the Comedy Store on the Sunset Strip, where he performed longer than an hour, said Dean Gelber, the West Hollywood club's general manager.

    Interesting how the news about the guy getting better gets no press, but when there are rumors of him going batshit insane, people are all over it. Welcome back to America, Dave!

  • I can't wait for Get Behind Me, Satan, the new White Stripes record coming out Tuesday, and In Your Honor, the double album Foo Fighters record a week after. That's it. Just mentioning it. I'll have reviews of these two and the new Sleater-Kinney, The Woods, up as soon as I hear 'em.

  • Ever barf, but there's nothing there to barf? So you're like gutting up stomach acid, and when it's coming up it's burning your esophagus, and you can barely breathe? And after you're done, and you're ready to go sweat it out some more in bed, you look at yourself real quick in the mirror, and you actually make yourself gasp over how pale and white you look?

    No? Dude, it sucks.

  • If you saw Alan Embree on the street, would you...

    a) beg him to retire
    b) wonder out loud why he thought straight 90 MPH fastballs down the middle of the plate was a sound stragey for retiring MLB hitters
    c) KAY-YA-KARATE CHOP! his left shoulder/ elbow/ wrist
    d) break out laughing
    e) break out crying
    f) break out your revolver

    Please, if you want to leave a comment here, understand answering this question is a pre-requisite. Thanks. Also, let's keep the answers rational and not get too hotheaded. This is a family site.

    I'd pick a, then b, followed by c into f and switching between d and e until a cop arrived.

  • The Batman Begins countdown begins, t-minus 10 days and countin', yo. What the hell does "t-minus" stand for, anyway? What's that come from?

    I feel like I got progressively more and more excited about this movie as I went to work at my temp assignment these past two weeks and, on 42nd St. between Madison and 5th was this giant uber-movie poster 5 stories tall with the cowl staring down at me. In fact, I'd be seeing it again for another week, only the company only needed two guys going forward, not the four we had, and I lost out. It was a game of "pick a number, one out of a hundred," and I went with the easy choice for me- 45- and the guy picked 75. I was actually the farthest away.

    I think my previously mentioned barf bout came after a grilled chicken burrito at some tourist-y place the head honcho took us to on the company for lunch Friday. While there, one dude said he was vegetarian, consented to the place anyway, and ordered baby back ribs. Hilarious. He liked some cool music, so that was cool.

  • Big Dennis and Callahan fan? Big fan of clueless bigoted assholes? If you answered "yes" to either of these...

    Callahan not fond of 'fruitcake'
    June 3, 2005

    Don't count on big mouth broadcasters John Dennis and Gerry Callahan to show up at this weekend's "Queer Eye" party at Club Cafe. Chatting with Red Sox CEO Larry Lucchino on WEEI yesterday, Callahan was miffed that Carson Kressley and friends are being allowed to throw out the first pitch at Fenway Sunday. Callahan asked Lucchino if the Sox brass received complaints about "fruitcakes" "sashaying" in front of children and families, and on a Sunday, of all days. "No," replied Lucchino. (The Fab 5 will be in Boston as part of Pride Week and to screen excerpts of the "Queer Eye" season premiere featuring the Sox.)... Since D & C have been called on the carpet before -- comparing a gorilla to a Metco student earned them a two-week suspension -- we wondered if WEEI program manager Jason Wolfe was upset. Nope. It's not that Kressley's gay, he explained, "it's the openness and the flaunting of it." Hmm. Joe Solmonese, president of the Human Rights Campaign and an Attleboro native, had this to say: "Sounds to me like... the people at the radio station need a makeover."

    I like that one of the things that pissed him off was that it would happen "on a SUNDAY of all days!" These guys have radio shows. Assholes. Sorry, if you still think homosexuals are "wrong" or "sinful" or "living incorrectly," you're a fucking turd and I don't want to know you. Here's the link. I'm proud my favorite team isn't afraid to do something like this in such an adversarial atmosphere.

    Also, here's Gerry Callahan's bio on WEEI.com, including his list of hobbies. What a homo.

    Gerry has two children, Shannon and Jack and is married to Tracy. In his free time he enjoys golf, basketball, whittling, collecting hummels, and yard sales.

  • I also want to hear what people have as their "worst movie of all time" picks. I'd go with-

    --Bad Boys II
    --Batman and Robin
    --Bringing Down the House (thanks Erin!)
    --The Terminal
    --Chasing Amy
    --Jay and Silent Bob Fart Around a Soundstage For Two Hours of Time Wasting, Eye Gouging Stupidity and Self- Obsession
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