27 August 2004

Bonds Not Human, Sox Rolling Like a Stone...

This is totally insane. At first, when I'd heard of the story, I assumed it was someone overreacting to what was intended to be something all the more innocent. Once I saw the picture, I was less sure. Then, I read this:

Pedron said Lisy did not notice the small plastic figurines until two people complained, but there is no mistaking what the toys represent: At the bottom of each is the product number 9011.

So it was intentional, and obviously pretty nasty. Interesting that someone actually got something this absurdly offensive into the stores BEFORE being seen. The clerks put it on the shelf? The people who ran the store didn't eat the cost and throw 'em out? Just a really weird story. Pretty sick.

I tuned into ESPN Sunday Night Baseball to watch Barry Bonds hit two of the most absurd home runs I've ever seen tonight in Atlanta.

The Not-Human One now stands at 38 on the year, 696 in his career (check out the Bullshit Memorial Bonds HR Tracker). His 2004 OBP, .607, would put him 8th in Major League Baseball in SLUGGING PERCENTAGE! He is currently 18 HRs away from Ruth, 59 from Aaron, and currently showing no signs of stopping. The two he hit tonight had Hank Aaron (in the broadcast booth) speechless, and turned out to be the 2nd and 3rd longest ever hit at Turner Field. The fact that there is even a discussion at this point as to the possibility Bonds might NOT win the MVP this year is unbelievable- in fact, Joe Idiot Morgan went so far as to say that Bonds shouldn't get it because Beltre's Dodgers and Rolen/ Pujols's Cards both have better records than Bonds's Giants. Ignoring the obvious stupidity of such a comment, consider that the difference between Bonds's OPS and Beltre's is equal to the difference between Beltre's OPS... and Rey Sanchez's.

For no good reason besides my boredom, I decided to go back and see what seasons, specifically, Barry Bonds deserved to win the MVP. Here they are, with the bold years being ones he DID win.

1990, 1991, 1992, 1993, 1996, 2000*, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004
*this one is close, between he and Kent, and seeing that Kent plays 2B, he has something of a case- but Barry's numbers are better for the year.

I love turning on a Giants game, waiting for his AB, and if they aren't trying to walk him, knowing there's a tremendous chance of seeing him hit one out. Genius.

I take a strange joy, a strange sense of victory knowing I completely, 100% forgot the 2004 MTV Video Music Awards started tonight. Anyway, if that sort of thing interests you, here's the list of winners. Outkast won Best Video for "Hey Ya!" which wasn't even the best video from their last album ("Roses" was way cooler), Jet won an award which, in and of itself, should damn the show to eternal hell for encouraging the rawk-by-numbers poseurs. Anyway, I should probably not be hating on a show I didn't even watch. Tony Hawk's Underground won for "Best Soundtrack for a Video Game" (what? Where's the video in this award?), and that was well-deserved. One of the best music soundtracks for any game, ever.

Last thing on the awards- a quote from Usher (it's worth noting that celebrities arrived to the Miami event in boats- mostly yachts)

Usher, who like Luda and many others came in a white suit, was the first to arrive by water, on a massive silver yacht. "I wanted not only the sexiest and flyest boat, but also the fastest," he said.

Usher still looking for that penis-substitute that fits just right. "Overcompensating" is the word of the day, Usher.

The Sox won again today, 6-1 over the Tigers at Fenway, making it a clean 4 game sweep of Detroit. Wakefield had his best outing of the season, going 8 strong innings with 3 H, 1 BB, 7 K, ER for the win. The Red Sox have won 6 in a row, 12 of their last 13, 16 of their last 19, and currently stand atop the AL Wild Card standings, 1.5 up on Anaheim, 3 on Texas. The Yankees have finally gotten back within sight, too- we trail the Yankees by only 4.5 with 6 to play between the teams left this year. Of course, this week brings the start of the most crucial 9 game stretch of the season- 9 against Anaheim (home), Texas (home), and Oakland (road). I would guess that a 6-3 record in these games would all but bury the competition for the Wild Card. Hopefully, our hot streak is a touch hotter than the Angel's current nearly-identical hot streak, and we can handle them at home where we couldn't in Anaheim. Also, this from RedSox.com:

By the end of the week, the Sox are also hoping to get infielder Pokey Reese (strained right ribcage) and right fielder Trot Nixon (strained left quad) playing in minor league games.

This is a HUGE turn-around from the looks of Trot's being shut down last. To hear him and all the reports ON him in the last few days- it would appear that Trot playing against righties down the stretch is something we can look forward to. It's easy to forget that one of the AL's best hitters from 2003 has been all but entirely absent from our lineup all year with no one but Gabe Kapler to replace him. On a personal level, I totally and completely miss Trot. I hope he's back soon- his bat would, in any way/ shape/ form, be enormous for us down the stretch and into October.

Fight the power, folks. Keep it up. Kerry/ Edwards 2004.

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